Gratitude Statement: I am grateful to be alive.
Please watch this clip (part 1 and 2) that I have embedded above. This is a fat suit experiment that was performed by 115 lb reality TV star Melissa Gorga from the Real Housewives of New Jersey. This really broke my heart because I’ve lived that life for real. When I think back to the fatboy days, I remember the feelings, bodily sensations, and smells so vividly that is scares the shit out of me.
Melissa was dressed up in a 400 pound fat suit and walked the streets of New York City to see the difference in people’s reactions as an obese woman. As you can see from the video, the condescending looks were non-stop along with 1 person actually engaging in rude questioning about how much she weighed. When she started eating a hot-dog she had purchased from a local cart, people were looking at her like … yo you don’t need to be eating that … put it down and go for a jog. When she dropped her gloves, a group of men just stood there and watched her bend over and let her struggle to pick up the gloves on her own as if they were so amused by it. When she had to hail a cab, it took her multiple tries to catch a cab.
On the contrary, when she stripped her self out of the fat-suit … there was no judgement of her eating a hot dog nor did she have trouble hailing a cab. It’s real talk being a fit beautiful woman in this world is huge social advantage.
Then people want to say everyone is beautiful inside and out. Fuck that. Let’s get real. That’s politically correct bullshit. Very few people will take the time to figure out your inner beauty. How beautiful your soul is? or How kind of a person you are? Nobody stops on an Instagram page while swiping through hundred of tits and ass pictures and say … oh wait let’s stop to see how nice she is. It’s just not true.
This topic gets me so amp’d up that I can feel my heart pushing through my chest. When people used to ask me why I worked out so hard, I used to tell people that I wanted to have options in life. I wanted the option to shop clothes wherever I wanted. I wanted the option of being an asshole if I wanted to be. I wanted the option to be able to date the girls I wanted to. But most importantly, I wanted the option of not living like a pariah.
When I was at the height of my obesity, stepping foot outside the house was torture. The world looks at you through a narrow lens of judgement. The exact things that happened to Melissa in the video were a daily occurrence for me. Judging me as to why I was supersizing my Mickey D’s meal when I shouldn’t be eating it in the first place. Looking at me like me like … what fuck man how you get so fat. Girls would look at me with … don’t even think about it. People are less willing to hold the door open for you, less willing to hold the elevator door while you run, less willing to be considerate in general when you’re fat.
For those people that are fat right now and experiencing something similar … let’s be real you’re just not taking care of yourselves. I think the reason why people disrespect us is because we neglected ourselves physically and emotionally. Let me put this in perspective … I’m sure you’re role models aren’t fat people either. We are all the same so if you don’t want to be looked at funny, stared at with rude judgement, treated like a creep from the opposite sex … get your shit together. I’m not preaching … I’m really trying to say I think you deserve better.
Not everyone is outwardly beautiful … pure fact … no judgement. I also don’t think that beauty is the gateway to success and happiness in life, but I do believe it is very difficult to cultivate relationships and attract people to find out about who you really are when you’re fat. I think there are 2 ways of looking at it:
1)I hate the world that fat people aren’t treated “fairly” so I will continue to eat my life away.
2)I recognize that the way people treat me is simply a social reflection of how I treat myself so let me get to work on myself.
You make the choice.
Thank you for reading and have a great rest of the weekend.
~FatBoyShrink~
FatBoyShrink 